‘If I’m Not There’
Words by Nastasia Khmelnitski Created by WÜL COLLECTIVE
If I’m not there, then who is? — a question the main character of the film is deeply preoccupied with. The existential question dwells throughout the narrative, leading us through the dream-like state followed by a quest in the forest, eventually lingering in the viewers’ minds as seemingly no answer is available in this reality. Repetition is the easiest way in an attempt to come closer to a meditative state, to open one’s capacity to embrace the additional, at times, unattainable layers, which the heroine is willing to explore.
Once the action is complete, it stays in the past, accessible only through the memories. Fighting the possibility to forget the routine movements, the fear of losing their importance, the character, through repetition of the same steps, tried to linger in the state of her actions. The restless craving to break the boundaries, the blazing expectation of understanding what is beyond lead us towards the mystical cube, mesmerizing with its light.
The tension between darkness and light, the living and the long time gone, painfully drills, touching all the memories accumulated since the beginning of it all. The sound plays an important role: water, distant voices, the rustle of the branches below the feet, the silence of the plants lead us back to the struggle between trying to stay awake and stepping outside the familiar boundaries to discover the new phase in existence. This conscious choice is critical in the narrative of the film as the path diverges in two directions. Recollecting Robert Frost’s The Road Not Taken, “Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, And sorry I could not travel both” one decision, one way, one possibility of unlocking the following experiences.
The cube stands for the unknown, the subconscious, the real, the never to take place. It beckons. It holds new possibilities. It is welcoming. It is dangerous. What if I could see myself from the third person’s perspective? What if it is my own perspective? What am I missing? Am I missing myself? Once the choice is made, the road back is blocked by the memory; however, the light prevails. There is still hope on this untrodden path. The film is leading towards the rediscovery of the self through disturbing thought processes. Shot on ARRI’s ALEXA Mini LF, Canon’s Auto Zoom 815 Super 8, and Bolex H16 — the film emphasizes the line that might be crossed and the balance that is sought.
CCA – Center for Contemporary Art Tel Aviv
Center for Contemporary Art Tel Aviv is a non-collecting institution fostering practices, discussions, and reflections connected to the most relevant issues of our times. The goal of CCA Tel Aviv is to commission and produce new projects by radical living artists with a special focus on giving an institutional frame to artists from Israel. Presenting a rigorous and multifaceted program of exhibitions, events, and printed matter in Hebrew, Arabic, and English, the Center is a dynamic hub with an artist-driven spirit that makes it a home for the city’s vibrant contemporary art scene.
Christina Seewald
Christina Seewald is a clothing brand based in Vienna that addresses contemporary knitwear. Focusing on sustainability and high-quality production, the brand creates a merge between the traditional approach and modern knitwear designs. For Christina, social issues are intrinsically woven into the brand’s DNA. She raises topics like equality and sexuality through the feminine gaze, playing on the balance between fragility and power. In the AW 21|22 collection, Christina Seewald explores the theme of repetition and the possibility of personal transformation in the never-to-be-exhausted continuity.
You studied Textile Design for the B.A., later moving to Knitwear Fashion in your M.A degree, both from Central Saint Martins in London. What were some of the noteworthy circumstances that led you to, eventually, choosing your niche and focus on knitwear?
CS
Especially during my Bachelor's, I was experimenting a lot with textiles — and I was instantly drawn towards knitwear because it's something very technical to get into and has endless options within its design, shape, and volume. I think the way knit adjusts to the body made me pursue this pathway and push forward with knitwear development. It allows such a beautiful connection between body, material, and movement.
The main recurrent themes you pioneer with your collections are femininity and sustainability. What fascinated me the most was the way you referred, in one of the interviews, to the team as an important element of sustainability (preserving employees), a topic that isn't yet spoken about widely. What is your vision for team building, what is the character of your team?
CS
The team is one of the most significant parts of growing. It was hard in the beginning to give up responsibility. But finding trustworthy, amazing people that understand the identity of my brand made it work. I hope I can build a network and give people space to develop within my brand. It’s about us growing and developing new ideas and ways of working sustainably.
Supporting the female gaze, female empowerment, and freedom through the positioning of your brand and the designs you create, how do you think the perception of what is feminine, what is allowed, of the acceptable - changes with time through fashion?
CS
My perception as a woman: you should have the choice to wear and be out there in any way you want. Nevertheless, it’s important that you feel yourself and that it’s something you embrace. There is no wrong and right anymore. We should just learn that there are different ways of how fashion can look on a body, and there is no norm existing anymore that was made up from the fashion industry of the past — I think we should really work to continue changing this system.
What is your main theme for the next collection in preparation?
CS
Well, I’m not going to spoil too much, but it’s about animals that have been very representative in their status, especially in males and females. So I'm just trying to play with male and female perception and its power relations.
